Kannalane!!!

கற்றறிந்த உன்னை வார்த்தையால் கடத்த இயலாமல்
கடை கண் பார்வையின் துணை தேடினேன்
வர்ணனையால் என் மனதுடன் சேர்த்து
கண்களையும் கைது செய்தாயே!!!
நிராயுதமாய் காதல் எனும் போரில்
என்னை தோற்க்கடித்தாயே!!!!

Kaadhal Anukkal!!!

கரை சேரும் அலையாய்
மண் சேரும்  மழையாய்
மலர் சேரும் காற்றாய்
நம் மனம் சேர காத்து இருக்கும்
இந்த வலியிலும் ஒரு சுகம்
அன்பே! இது என்ன ரகம்!!!

Memorabilia for many ;) Part 4

It has been a week since Diya had received the text message from Arvind.

Today was going to be the first day of college after the semester break.

Diya, a class representative, was busy handling all paper work for various professors throughout the day in addition to the course work. A five minute recess break is all she could take off during the whole day.

It was already their fourth day at college and Arvind had still not got a response from Diya.

Diya receives a message in the afternoon...

"Would you mind acknowledging receipt of my message, Ms.Busy Bee?"

"I did receive your message Arvind. Sorry about the delay. I need to talk to you. Lets probably try catching up this weekend if that works for you."

"It sure does Diya. Looking forward to talking to you. Love you"

"Catch ya on Saturday. Take care Arvind."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saturday Evening

It has been half an hour since they met.

Diya was playing in water like she always does everytime she visits a beach.

Arvind remained a mere spectator for a while before he called out for her. "Diya! Come here."

"Yes.. Arvind... 2 minutes pls.." Diya continues to play in the water and then comes to the shore and sits next to Arvind.

A: So, do you have a response for my message Diya?

D: Did you even ask for one? I thought you just wanted to convey what you felt. You did not ask for any response via that message Arvind.

Diya! I thought it was fairly obvious that I expect a response from you? Can't you even think that far?

Well! Arvind! To be honest enough, I must say, I have thought beyond that. Tell me Arvind... What made you realize things all of a sudden? Did cupid's arrow strike you from somewhere?

Diya! I have always wanted you in my life. Just that I was unclear of the extent to which I wanted to take things. All through the 20 days of my trip, I could not see a single thing the way I do. I have always wanted to tell you what I have seen, what would interest you and what you would like. And that's when I realized that I needed you so much in life and that you are indispensable. I called ya immediately after I got back, and couldn't stand the fact that you were with Rishi. I missed talking with you for long hours everyday. I missed teasing you, pulling your legs, fighting with you. I missed you totally.

Is this reason not good enough to convince you? Well! Actually, I don't think I would wanna convince someone to fall in love with me. Forget it!! I rest my case!!

Diya carries an unperturbed look on her face and says, "How many girls have you liked in the past Arvind?"

"mmmm... to tell ya the truth.. many..."

"How many have u liked in this college? How many do u think you can fall in love with?"

"None that I can think of. But yeah.. I can definitely drool over many though.."

"Why did u have to pick me off the lot? Was it cos I said I thought I was falling in love with you?"

"Not really. I feel that you are the one person who has known me better; who could accept me the way I was; who would know what I can think of even before I start thinking; whom I can expect to be by my side come what may.."

Exactly.. I have always accepted you the way you have been.. Be it when you told me that you did not have any feelings for me; Or when you actually claimed to love me;

I did not claim Diya! I LOVE YOU!

But you are not ready to accept me the way I have been. Be it a month back or now. Then, you were not ready to understand that I was falling for you. All that mattered to you was your sense of insecurity. Today, you are not able to tolerate the fact that I am being my normal self even after you have proposed to me. Do you always want me to react the way you want me to? Can't I have a heart and a mind of my own?

Arvind!!! Frankly speaking, I should be more than happy to hear all that you have said cos that is what I have always wanted to hear from you. But today, I don't feel that good. Had you sent me a message during your trip or immediately after you got back, I would have felt wonderful. You took time off to weigh things, only after you realized that I did not have enough time allocated for you. It was your insecurity that triggered this decision. This is not what you want Arvind!

I do love you but I am sure if we start a relationship on this basis, you are gonna run away the moment you meet someone you might think is a better fit!

I don't think I can find anyone better than you Diya!!

There you go... Again.... There is a difference between "wanting" and "not wanting" to find... I can fall for a person who would not want to care to find someone better than me. Not for a person who thinks he cannot find one better than me given an opportunity.

There is a subtle difference Arvind...

Diya!! As I told you earlier, I rest my case here. I think its fair enough for you to take your own time like I did. I just want you to know that you would be the only one in my life.

I am sorry Arvind. Lets not talk about this any further and be GOOD FRIENDS like you have always wanted... Lets get off this perspective and be friends and see what life has in store for both of us...

Arvind!!! Do you mind taking me to Barista? I am badly in need of some coffee...

A preoccupied Arvind hesitates to move from where he was sitting...

Does it mean that you would get me a coffee only if I called you out on a date and not on any normal day??

Oh ya Diya! LETS GO. Your witty comments don't work with me anyways babe!!! One Hazelnut Cappuccino right???

Damn!! This guy makes me fall all over in love with him again. What on earth is stopping me from saying 'YES'?

Memorabilia for many ;) Part 3

After the 20 day long trip, Arvind is back home. Happy, contented and rejoiced is how one would describe what Arvind felt. After a small refreshment, he picks the phone and dials Diya's number.

"Hello Aunty! Is Diya at home?"

Hello Arvind! How are you doing? Hope you enjoyed the vacation.

Diya doesn't stay at home these days. Poor Girl! Totally bored cos we couldn't plan a neat vacation. She must be with Rishi, at his place.

Oh! Thanks Aunty! Will try calling her mobile phone then. Bye.

Arvind calls Diya's mobile waiting to hear a Hello from the other end.

Hey dude!! Wassup man! When did you get back?

After a pause, Arvind realizes that the person at the other end is waiting for his response.

Hi Rishi! How are you doing man? Just got back home. The trip was good. Is Diya around?

Oh yeah.. My cousins have come down for a vacation and Diya is with them. She din hear the phone ring. Picked the phone seeing your name dude. Wait a minute!

Hey Diya! Its Arvind.

Yeah Rish! Coming!

After a 2 min silence, Diya picks the phone to say a "Hello.. Arvind! You there?"

Arvind felt a sudden rush of adrenaline... Good Lord!! How much I missed this voice? How badly did I wanna talk to her everyday?

Rishi! Stop messing with that. Don't you dare touch that thing.. Arvind!! I need to get back to Rishi right away. Will call ya sometime in the evening. Bye.

But Diya.... Beep...Beep... The call had already ended.

Not knowing what to do next, an hour had already passed by...

Arvind picks the phone and dials Rishi's number... Hey Man!!! How about going to the beach in the evening? Thought it would be a nice idea to meet you all after a long vacation.

Oh sure... Lets meet at 7 at the beach then.. Probably, I should call Adi and others too in that case...

Ok then.. Catch ya Rish!! Bye...

Diya was caught with her cousin's wedding prep the whole of next week. She couldn't squeeze time in to answer phone calls from friends. All she could keep track of was the fact that Arvind called her atleast a dozen times everyday. Thinking that she was anyways gonna meet him at college, she din bother to give much thought to it.

On the day of her cousin's wedding, Diya receives a message from Arvind.

"I dunno when and how all this happened... I have realized that am totally in love with you... Wanna live and die with you baby.. Don't hate me so much for having kept you waiting... I now understand how hard it is... Miss you loads.. Luv Arvind"

Diya goes blank for a minute when she hears her mom call her..

Ya Mom!!! Coming...

(To be cont.d)

Memorabilia for many ;) - Part 2

It was Diya's birthday. She was treating her friends on this occasion. When the treat was almost over, Arvind enters the Cafeteria.

Hey Guyz!! Wassup??? Looks like a celebration!!!

"Hey Arvind! Its a birthday celebration... Join Us", says Rishi

Yeah man... But tell me whose birthday it is?

Its Diya's birthday dude!! Hey Diya! Come here...

"Hi Arvind!", Diya waves her hand with a subtle smile though the excitement of having met Arvind's eyes was ripping her life from inside.

Hi Diya! Wish you a very happy birthday :)

No. It is not today. It was yesterday..

Oh! I am sorry. My belated wishes on your birthday..

"Rishi!! Where are you?? Come here and listen to what Adi is saying"

Rishi disappears....

The noise around could not break their silence. Realizing that Diya is not going to initiate a conversation, Arvind starts..

Diya! So tell me about you.. Where are you from? How long have you known Rishi?

Wow!! Wow!! Arvind!! This is too fast for me... Gimme some time to take my eyes off you..

With this thought running in her mind, her mouth had started spilling the response automatically..

Though the recognized seasons are 4 in number, its always been one for Diya and Arvind - Spring. Their acquaintance blossomed to friendship which eventually did blossom to love with everyone but them knowing it. It can also be thought that they did not really want to realize what was happening between them.

Nobody can escape reality and live with pretensions for long... Diya and Arvind were no exceptions to this.

During the usual long hours of telephonic conversation, Arvind says,

"Diya! Forgot to tell ya.. My family has this customary annual trip planned for 20 days. This year it is going to be Kulu and Manali. It is going to be absolutely exciting. Full 20 days away from college, out of every single connection, having nothing but fun."

"Diya! Are you there???? heloooooo"

A preoccupied Diya says, "Nice to know that dude!! Have fun"

Arvind: Are you ok? Is there anything bothering you? Do you want me to call ya after a while?

Absolute silence from Diya's end confirms that something is indeed wrong.

Arvind: Tell me whats wrong... Let me see if I can help you with it.

Diya: What are we upto? Whats happening?

A: I don't understand the context. Could you please make things more clear?

D: Don't you see what is happening? Everyday immediately after I wake up, I start messaging you; we do this all through the day; meet during break and lunch; keep messaging on the way back home; talk over the phone once we reach home; after a while, messages again start flying; till a last "Good Night. Sweet Dreams" after which we chat for close to an hour.

D: When I see from outside, I don't see just Diya anymore. All I see is "Diya with Arvind." I am not sure if this is what we both want of life or is it just happening this way.
Arvind... Are you there? Are you even listening?

A: Yes.

D: I want an answer from you. Where exactly is this heading to?

A: Diya.. I don't know what is the kind of response you expect of me. I know for a matter of fact that I like talking with you and I enjoy your company. I don't know what else you want to know.

D: How long Arvind? How long is this going to be like this? For a life time? Ten years down the line, when we both have families, do you think we would still want to be the same? I expect a very practical response to this question. Please don't play around with words now.

A: No.

D: No for what?

A: For your question. We can't be the same ten years down the line.

D: Thanks Arvind.. So where exactly are we going to draw the line? What is the name we are giving this relationship of ours?

A: Diya.. It is you who is playing around with words now. I just don't understand what you want to hear from me. I don't understand why a discussion on my trip triggers something totally out of the way. Which part of this is troubling you Diya?

D: When I say bye to all my friends everyday, it is more like "Guyz!! Thanks for the fun, Catch ya later." With you, its not the same. I beg and plead myself to spend more and more time with you. When I go out to meet my friends, I wear what I like the most. But when I come to meet you, I think about what you said you like. I have started placing your interests before mine. It is YOU that matters to me more than my own self. I don't want to do this to some guy with whom I am going to share a "Hi-Bye" relationship.

A: Do you mean to say you are in love with me?

D: Does that mean that you have never thought about it even once till this moment?

A: Well!! Diya!! I am definitely not ready for it.

D: I know that. But if I am gonna let this continue, it would take me elsewhere. I would never be able to get back from there when you actually say something different. I need a clear cut definition for this relationship.

A: You have spoken for me.. You make the decision too.. Do I even have a choice to make my point?

D: You do. Tell me what you expect of me? Only a good friend? If so, I want you to tell me right away.

A: I want you with me forever as my good friend.

D: Nothing more; nothing less; Am I right?

A: ***Silence***

D: I am taking it as a confirmation.

Diya and Arvind are only friends. Good Friends....

With this, Arvind leaves for the trip with his family...

(To be cont.d)

Memorabilia for many ;) - Part 1

Diya! Wake up!!! You are no more in school now... Its your first day of college and look at you, sleeping like a kid...

Mom!!! Just 5 min... Won't you give me 5 min of my life???

Diya!!!I must say... You have learnt nothing but to talk all these years...

"Mom!!! That's what you have taught your daughter", chuckled Diya.

Diya! Now stop arguing and get to business... Get ready.. I don't want you to miss the college bus..

(After half an hour) Bye Mom!!! Diya rushes to the bus stop to miss the bus by a few seconds.

Oops! What next?? Auto!!! Could you please drop me at the University? Its getting late..

Diya boards the auto and heads straight to college...

First day at college

New faces; New ambience; Most of all no more uniforms :D Yippeee.. Diya waits to meet someone whom she could smile at and expect some reciprocation..

Hey Diya!!! Hey!! This way.. Look here...

Round the corner was Vivek, a friend of Diya's, from school.

Come.. Meet my friends - Rahul, Sanjay, Karthik and Preethi. Hey guys!! This is Diya, my friend from school, BE in Electronics... A brief introduction to her would be "Study.. Study.. Anything else???" - You can see this quote unanimously in her slam book.

A mixed expression of blush and anger floods Diya's face. Vivek!! Is it necessary to say all this?? Guyz!! Am no such nerd as he describes.. He is just exaggerating :) He is very well known for that...

Talking all this, her eyes traverse right to left across the corridor to find a known face... Wait a minute.. Her eyes came to a standstill when they met the eyes of this guy who's smile was so obviously captivating.

After looking at him for one full minute, she realizes that its really odd to stare at random dudes. By then, they had actually exchanged smiles and a "hi, how are you?" without talking.

C'mon guys!! Why must you talk when your eyes can actually express everything??

But then, for a levelheaded, self-conscious Diya, it was embarrassing.. No more of exchanging smiles with random guys.. With this thought running in her mind, she heads to her classroom just to hear someone call her.. Diya!!!!!!!!!!!!

She turns back to realize Rishi heading towards her. "Hey Diya! You have been staring at me for a while now, if you realize. I thought you would stop by and say a hi. Wassup Madam?? Lost in whose thoughts on the very first day of college ;)" Rishi is a good friend of hers from school. Though they have not spent much time together, knowing that they are in the same plane, turn out to be good friends (look out for more about them :))

Oops!! Now I know why this guy was smiling at me and he very well knows that I did not realize the presence of Rishi anywhere around. A very subtle smile on his face said that all, making her feel even more embarrassed.

Diya! This is Arvind from Computer Science. Arvind.. Diya.. I was just telling him about you.

"Hi Diya" Nice to meet you.. A sudden chill runs through her spine when she heard his mesmerizing voice.. WTH is happening??

"Hellooooooo"

"Oh! Sorry!! Same here"

They both shook hands (who knows if these hands are made to be together forever ;))

Rishi! Need to get going. Catch ya later.. Bye Arvind!

Exchange of a smile is worth than a zillion words....

End of Part 1 (Wait and Watch :D)

மனதை திருடிவிட்டாய்!!!

கிடைத்த அரை மணி துளியில்
மனதை மொத்தமென கடத்திய கள்வனே !!!

அன்று கண்களால் பேச தெரிந்த போது
மனதை அறிய மறந்தேன் !!!

இன்று மனதை உணர முயன்று
கண்ணிழந்து நிற்கின்றேன் !!!

என் பரிதவிப்பை பார்த்த பின்பும்
ஏன் இந்த புண்சிரிப்பு ???

இதை வரம் என்று கொள்வதா - இல்லை
சாபம் என்று தள்ளுவதா???

நான் என்னென்று சொல்ல ,
எதிர்த்து எங்கு செல்ல ???

உன்னிடம் சரண் அடைந்தேன் ;
அடைந்த பின் விடை அறிந்தேன் !!!